I don’t watch day time telly anymore. Once they took Neighbours off the air last year I’ve tended to not bother watching any TV during the day at all.
But my friend Kim messaged me to say they had a chap on This Morning who was doing a live stoma bag change.
Now this is what day time telly is for, for getting messages and information out to the masses.
Interesting things that can help make the world a better place.
Knowledge is power!
If you fancy a watch it is on This Morning’s instagram, and also on Mesha’s social media too.
I think this is an incredibly brave thing to do.
I have a very well behaved colostomy stoma and I wouldn’t change it in front of anyone, but to have an ilesostomy, which by their very nature can be unpredictable, and go on live television to do a bag change…wow!! Bravo that man! That is bold and brave.
I’m so glad he did!
When we demystify and talk openly about stomas, the less stigma there will be.
It’s worth a watch.
And worth a follow if you have IBD or a stoma.
Holly and Summer are also part of the IBD community and are equally definitely worth following also, as they are very open and informative about their stoma experience.
There are differences between Mesha’s stoma and mine.
The majority of stoma content creators I follow have had an IBD (inflammatory bowel disease), and they tend to need their colon removed or reduced, which means they have ileostomy surgery.
So the stomas I have seen tend to look fairly similar to Mesha’s stoma.
I don’t know enough about ilesostomy to know if they are all pretty similar to that, but judging by a few comments I saw online not all ilesostomies are alike.
Mine is a colostomy, so it’s not long at all. Small, round, like a closed rose bud. Closer fitting to my body.
Also, Mesha mentioned his has no nerve endings and therefore no pain receptors.
I don’t know how or why, but mine certainly seems to. I definitely know about it if I catch it on something, most commonly a door handle. It’s most inconveniently door handle height and I am most inconveniently very clumsy. It has happened more than you’d imagine. 🫣🤭🤩
I can often get a stinging tingling sensation, which I aptly named Stingly.
Not all the time of course, only when I’ve done something daft…or I happen across an over zealous security guard at the airport.
*By the way, it’s just occurred to me that I never heard back from the head of Stansted after my complaint, so I guess we can assume from his silence that he doesn’t give a flying fuck (if you’ll pardon the pun) about travellers who have differences or disabilities. So that’s nice. Nice to know my words were irrelevant to the running of an airport professionally and safely.
The customer is king, apart from when a business doesn’t want to spend any additional money or time on training people properly.
Good to know, noted. Thank you Stansted. 🤔🫣😂
*This is a stock image from the internet. But this is fairly representative of what my stoma looks like, though mine is smaller.
In general it’s painless, even though it’s bright red and sore looking, it’s my colon, so it’s got a full blood supply, that’s what the rosiness is due to.
It ideally needs to protrude a little from the body to help prevent bag leaks.
I don’t actually show anyone mine, I admire those who do, because they are educating people along the way, but as I am very shy, and I wouldn’t have ever shown anyone my arsehole, I don’t show my stoma.
Anyway, I digress, back to stomas and their individual characteristics…
There are others too, but these are the main ones.
Every single person is different of course. These are just general terms.
Even within the bracket of colostomy there are different types, and different locations.
And of course within the umbrella of stomas no two will be the same. They will look different to one another, and behave differently, depending on where it is, and at times just luck of the draw.
I have a descending colostomy, so it’s right at the end of the line of the colon.
My output is going to be more similar to that of someone with a functioning rectum and anus.
Whereas ilesostomies are often going to be on the more loose/liquid output (again, depending on location). My output is formed and firm, and a lot of the time dry AF where I get so constipated.
I have to say, mine is probably the easiest of all stomas, because leaks and other issues aren’t generally in my day to day life.
If I do get a malfunction, it’s usually from a faulty air filter on the bag, rather than an escape of contents.
Although pancaking can occur. This is when the output seeps under the base plate and escapes that way.
Pancaking and filter failures have been thankfully very rare occurrences for me. And I am incredibly grateful for that.
I am very grateful to Mesha, and all of the content creators who put themselves out there to educate and inspire.
So onto the blog, I might not show you my naked stoma, but I’m happy to show the clothes I wear whilst having one.
Because for me wondering if I could still dress well after surgery was something that worried me pre op.
Jeans from Paige, Top from Reiss, Cardigan from Me&Em, Shoes from M&S
The weekend before last I came up with what I thought was a genius plan.
I heard about a world war 2 reenactment festival which was taking place at a venue very close to our house.
So seeing as Sam loves that sort of era, and Chris and Ben would be interested too, I suggested I have my family birthday weekend planned to coincide with the event.
Sam, Milly and Zak came up from Hampshire, and we made a weekend of it.
It’s very much not my cup of tea or vibe, but I was pretty sure the others would be interested. And it seemed like a bit of fun.
The advert made me cackle because the big selling point was to “Meet Yvette from Allo Allo”. Very retro.
Anyway, it was a strange day, and a bit confusing for me.
I don’t suppose I’ve ever given too much thought, if any, to battle reenactment societies. But if I had, I would have assumed that people in the groups would have their name picked out of a hat to be the baddies on that particular occasion, because no one would want to dress up as a Nazi…surely…
But it turns out I was wrong, they do, gleefully.
And it just doesn’t sit right with me.
It also never occurred to me that anyone would be buying or selling Nazi “memorabilia”…again, I’d be very wrong.
Terribly confusing to see it being sold next to the Royal British Legion stall selling poppies. 🤷🏼♀️
I just assumed we’d all had a vote on Nazi’s being bad (the whole world war, and millions of deaths to defend against fascism, kind of cemented that notion for me), but apparently I am mistaken.
I get there has to be an opponent for recreation purposes, I just assumed they’d be reluctant opposition players.
The rest of it was interesting, informative and entertaining.
The singing and dancing was super popular.
I decided to pay homage to the Land Army gals in this little number…just to be very clear ~ allied land army. 🫣😂
Dress from Ralph Lauren, Shoes from Hermes
The weather was glorious, which was a relief as it’s been utterly insanely changeable in the extreme for the most part .
Allied = good
We visited most of the stalls, displays and reenactments, then left, and went to Nando’s and shopping…far less nazis…although probably not zero, but at least they weren’t brazen with it.
Sunday was fabulous as we headed to a pub we love locally for a massive Sunday roast and a very delightful rhubarb crumble 🥰
Top from Me&Em, Jeans from Tesco, Cardigan from Maje, Shoes from Gucci
I’ve decided to try and get more active, and build muscle and bone density. So I’m doing everything I can to facilitate that.
It’s exhausting but necessary. At a certain point it’s time to take stock and try and future proof the shell we live in.
Do I want to? God no!! I am a lazy *****
Do I need to? Yes, sadly I do. So work on it I must!
Then on the Monday night we decided it’d be a great idea to meet friends for dinner in London.
(Errrrr, a school night is bold enough at our age…but a Monday night!?! What were we thinking?!?) 😂
Top and Trousers from Me&Em, Shoes from Jimmy Choo.
It was a really fun night to be fair. It was a late one, but a great one. I don’t know why I’m making a fuss, I didn’t have to get up for work the next day like the others did.
We went to Amaya, which is a sister restaurant to Chutney Mary. And it is sensational!
It’s slightly cheaper than CM, and the food was quite different to it, but no less delicious. In fact, it was amazing! The sea bass was probably the best sea bass I’ve ever had, and the grilled prawns were heaven.
CM would still be my favourite pick, but I know we’ll be going back to Amaya again very soon.
I got up the next day and decided it was the perfect day to cycle into my local town…I checked the weather forecast as I left my house…it said it would be bright and sunny…those lying *******!!
At least part of my cycle was in the dry.
Heaven 🥰
You currently need a Sou’wester, waders, shorts and T shirt, a bikini, thermals and a woolly hat here.
Top from Intimissimi, Jeans and Shoes from M&S
A very exciting event took place on Friday!
This old girl turned 53!!
And I couldn’t be happier and more delighted about it.
How lucky am I to still be here. Still ticking along, having an absolute blast.
Every single day is a blessing, and a birthday is just the icing on the cake.
I was spoilt rotten, I have no idea why, but I’m very thankful.
I received so many messages and texts from people. I was a bit stunned actually, they were such kind words. Which made me very happy and emotional.
I have this thing where I think most people don’t like me (this is not a fishing expedition, I’m not saying it for sympathy).
I don’t know why, I just have some very deep rooted insecurities from teenhood , where I felt incredibly isolated and alone, I suppose. So to receive so much love and kindness blew me away.
Of course the older I get, the more comfortable I am with the fact that I’m okay if people don’t actually like me, you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea, and that’s absolutely fine as it turns out. Literally nothing happens to you if people don’t like you. It’s okay.
And to be fair I don’t like everyone I meet too, who does?
So it’s not actually a problem or anything, it was just surprising how much kindness I received. I spent half the day blubbing. 🫶🏼🥰💝
Dress from Me&Em, Bag from Dior, Shoes from Aquazzura (bow tie pumps).
Chris took me back up to London to Chutney Mary, where else would be more fitting?
Anyway, we were sitting having drinks at the bar when Ben and Erin strolled in!
It was such a special surprise. I did feel guilty though, as Erin had to get the train up to enable the surprise to take place.
They only live round the corner to us so we could have easily picked her up and driven her.
I very much appreciated her and Ben’s efforts.
We had a fabulous time and an equally fabulous meal.
As we were leaving we were all popping to the toilets, Ben was straight behind me.
A man coming the other way stopped and very enthusiastically said to me “I love your shoes!”
It was odd, and I know Chris wouldn’t go round talking to other women, god no, one’s enough for that poor man!
I have no idea if this chap was just oddly friendly, flirty or a foot fetishist, but Ben was really miffed about it, apparently it’s unacceptable for strange men to talk to his mother. 🫣🤭😂
I’m not dead yet sunshine! 🤩😂🤭
Chris on the other hand is the most chilled man you’ll ever meet, and was unbothered by the interaction.
He said “Well they are really nice shoes, why do you think you’ve got them?”
😂
True story.
Then Saturday, us and some friends headed to Jimmy’s Farm & Wildlife Park.
What started off as a rare breeds pigs farm, has evolved, or escalated maybe is a better term - into a zoo.
It’s fantastic!
He has polar bears!! Polar bears at a farm!
It’s a great day out, and there’s a really good restaurant too.
I will say that getting a wheelchair over the gravel at the entrance was really really difficult, and in this day and age it shouldn’t be, we can do better.
But the rest of the park was ok-ish for wheelchair users.
Dress for the day you want…and I wanted to be a farm hand 😂.
When I was a child there was a program called Mr Benn, and he used to visit a magic fancy dress shop, and have adventures in the chosen outfits.
Well, I kind of live by that teaching. Life is all make believe. If you get lucky, it’s one giant dolls house. This is the one life we get, this is not a dress rehearsal, so enjoy it along the way.
(I am fully aware this is not the reality for everyone, I am fully aware of genocides, poverty and diseases, and I donate accordingly to offset my privilege).
Hat from Laird’s, Top from Intimissimi, Jeans from Tesco, Gilet from Holland Cooper, Boots from Dubarry.
This little artic fox was absolutely adorable, and seemed mesmerised by our friend Elle.
The Polar Express 🚂🤭
We had a great time at the farm/zoo and a really nice lunch.
I had the best Bakewell tart and cream that I’ve ever had. It’s worth going just for that. All in all it was a really fabulous birthday!
Then Sunday Chris took me up to London for my final spoiling.
Shopping, lunch, and back to the Schiaparelli exhibition, because he felt it was too busy for me to fully appreciate and enjoy it last time.
Chris bought me an Oura ring to help with getting me into peak physical and mental condition.
There’s only one Oura shop and that is on the 5th floor in Harrods by the escalator near the beauty department if you fancy getting one as well.
If you buy them online it seems like a right faff to get the ring sizer kit etc.
I don’t really know what it does, but I added access to my details to Chris’s phone and I’ll let him do the science bit, he can give me a synopsis of me. 🥰😂
Top from Me&Em, Jeans from Tesco, Shoes from Zara, Bag from Goyard.
We were also in Harrods because I wanted to go to the Maje clothes department as they had a sale on, and we happened to walk past The Georgian Restaurant.
I said “Oh I’m booking an afternoon tea there with Michelle”.
And he said “I really fancy an afternoon tea”
It was five past twelve at this point, but as he said, it’s after noon.
They had availability for there and then, so we did!
Afternoon tea is a carb fest. It’s incredibly filling. We had to bring half the cakes home, as we couldn’t finish them.
I very much enjoyed the homemade jam (preserves) trolley…I’m in the process of putting together one of my own too!
God bless eBay and Temu!
Who doesn’t want jams on wheels!!
Which jam did we want?
All of them please!
We were absolutely stuffed.
…Then I had to go and try clothes on, probably wasn’t my best plan 🫣😂
And then a short walk to the V&A for a repeat of the Schiaparelli exhibition.
Wearable? No, maybe not.
Sensational? Absolutely!
One of my beautiful birthday presents was this very apt t shirt from James and Tanya.
There is a restaurant in Corfu who refer to me as Prawn Lady, on account of me going there every day, mostly twice a day, for grilled prawns.
I am a prawn star 🌟
Then another Monday arrives and it’s back to hitting bone and muscle building again.
It’s probably going to be a long process, but I’m glad I started it at 52, not 62, or 72, or 82 etc etc.
I really like doing exercise early on a Monday morning because it kick starts my mood to continue it throughout the week.
It’s not something that comes naturally to me, but I am enjoying it…and the main point is…
Strong thighs save lives!
Have a fabulous week yourself. Keep well.
You might be lucky enough to see adverts for Bowel Research UK pop up from time to time on your social media. You lucky thing you! 🥰😂🤩
It made me laugh when I opened my instagram and saw it because for a split second I thought I’d posted something that I hadn’t remembered I’d posted.
It took me a minute to realise it wasn’t me who had posted it. 😂
