Feeling good...

I’ve had such a busy couple of weeks, so busy in fact that I realised I didn’t even write last week. I’m not claiming to be the busiest person in the planet ~ hardly, I just mean I was busy by my standards.  

I’ve got a few interesting things in the pipeline, one in particular that I’m very passionate about. Which is really exciting. I’m not sure if it’s that or if being given a few more hours at work that has boosted my confidence and my self esteem. I’m not really sure, but I feel flipping amazing! I know! Weird right!  

When you feel good on the inside I think it must shine out of you. I’ve had so many compliments in the last 10 days I’m getting a bit of a big head on! 

I had a wonderful compliment from Ben’s girlfriend Kaitlyn the other day, I was all dolled up feeling fab and she was enquiring about my shoes, and trying them on...she turned to me and said “I can’t wait for you to die so I can have all your shoes”

hahahahahahahahahahaha...she cracks me up, and you can’t get a better compliment than someone wanting all your stuff. Worryingly it’s the second time something like that has been said to me. I sleep with one eye open these days that’s for sure hahahahaha. 

I did have Reflexolgy the other day so maybe that’s helped make me feel fabulous too.  

Straight after Reflexolgy I popped into my local town centre, I was just getting a few bits from the supermarket when I gravitated towards the clothing section, always worth a look, supermarkets do some cracking must have pieces most seasons.   

Well Tesco didn’t disappoint. So many goodies on offer. 


I bought the trousers and the shorts version of the tiger stripes.  


The little tiger print cardigan is adorable but as I have a big bust I always end up looking matronly. I try to emulate Bree Vandercamp and end up looking like Hattie Jacques. hahahahaha 

Sainsburys have got some great pieces in too. I love finding bargains. I never compromise on bags and shoes but I do love a bargain out fit. Mainly because I’m a spiller and a ruiner of clothes. I’ve bleached too many to spend the big bucks on them! Hahahahaha  


Top from Reiss, Trousers from Tesco, Bag from Goyard, Shoes from Chloe.  


These trousers made me so happy. They’re high waisted for a comfortable and uninterrupted days pooing. And patterned enough to camouflage said pooing. What more could you ask for from a trouser. Well I suppose for those plumbed the old fashioned way it’s WAY more than they’d ever ask for! Hahahahaha  

It’s funny how natural it feels for me now that when I go clothes shopping I ponder the question can I easily poo in these? I didn’t see that coming 20 years ago or even 10 years ago that’s for sure. ;)  

These trousers and their wearer had a big day ahead.  

We (Chris, Ben and I) headed off to the south coast to visit Sam and Milly...and of course baby Zak. For an early Mother’s Day visit. I had hoped my mum and dad could come but they couldn’t make it so we’ll have to have a late celebration next weekend. Zachary has changed so much in the last 2 weeks alone, he’s growing so fast. 

It was wonderful to be all together. All my favourite boys in one place. Absolute heaven.  

Blissfully, my Tesco trousers did me proud. Although Sam did enquire what on earth I was wearing, but you can’t please everyone I guess, so it’s best to just please yourself. Hahahahaha  


Just hanging with my son and his son. xx


All my boys. Oh be still my heart. :) 


Heaven, right there. 


Milly, was celebrating her first Mother’s Day, and I was celebrating my 22nd. xx


My favourite photo of the day. My oldest love and my youngest love together. 💜 

No day out to Gosport is complete without a trip on the ferry over to Portsmouth, more importantly Gunwharf Quay. It’s a discount shopping village that ranks between Freeport Braintree and Bicester village...none of which can hold a candle to Woodbury Common in New York (or upstate New York I guess it must be).  

But it’s decent enough and I treated myself to a few little bits.  

I’m off to a very important wedding this Friday of my friend Gina. She’s waited many years for her handsome prince to come along and she’s finally going to get her fairytale ending. I literally can’t wait!   

I bought a dress which goes with a bag and shoes I already own. Which makes life easier and cheaper than having to buy the whole lot.  

We had such a lovely early Mother’s day. Had a fantastic meal in a really lovely restaurant/bar. I can imagine it would be heaving on a beautiful summers day. It was wonderful. 

 ....And then came Mothering Sunday itself. 

After a chilled morning with cards and gifts, even from Zachary, he’s so clever and thoughtful, he made me a lantern out of one of his old milk cans, that boy is a genius! Hahahahaha

We headed up to London where Ben (and probably Chris) booked a table at Bluebird in Chelsea.  

I love Bluebird, our dining there far predates its revived popularity on Made in Chelsea.  

I’ve had some fantastic meals there, I’ve had a disaster or two there too, where I’ve misread the menu...nothing unusual for me, dyslexia can be a right pain, especially the time I ordered the roast dinner for two for one!! Blimey that was a struggle to get through. Hahahahaha. Needless to say I didn’t get dessert on that occasion. Hahahahaha 


Top from Karl Largerfeld. (From Gunwharf Quays). 

I know he was an agest, sexist misogamist old fart but his brands do make exceedingly pretty clothes. Hahahahaha   


Now, I have to be careful with a flouncy sleeve, I’ve got form, many a time I’ve ruined an outfit by dipping my sleeves in food on the table. But I felt these would be controllable as they’re not too flary. 


Look at my baby boy. A badly broken collar bone and still taking his old mum out for lunch. He’s on the mend, well he was doing well till a shop assistant bumped into him in a store just after this lunch, poor Ben crumpled in agony whilst the shop fella looked on in horror. Hopefully it’s not moved anything in there. Fingers crossed. X


This time I had a lovely lunch, and two desserts as Ben is lactose intolerant and it was a set menu! Hahahahaha  


I was super proud of Ben, he has a very narrow palate, not physically you understand, just a very fussy eater that never grew out of it...weirdly he grew into it. He ate everything except melon as a small child and then just chicken nuggets, pork products and steak when he got a bit older and definitely no veg.  (can you sense I’m shaking my head at this point). 

Well as it was a set menu and he didn’t like the look of much on the starters menu he opted for steak tartare...a bold choice. Not one that I’ve ever chosen, I’ve only eaten fish and a bit of chicken for the last 24 years. Raw steak never appealed to me back in my bigger meat eating days.  

The verdict from Ben, I’m glad I’ve tried it but never again. I can see that. :) 

After lunch there was time to hit the shops. Chris bought me my birthday present (a bit early but I’m happy with that as I can wear them now). 

I love to look round high end shops for inspiration, I have a look at them and see if I can recreate them for less, a lot less. I saw an outfit in Ralph Lauren that I loved and that I already own some of the component parts, but no way am I paying over £300 for a white skirt (White is my nemesis at the best of times) anyway I found a great skirt in Zara for a fraction of the RL one, it wasn’t the same of course but it would achieve the look that I wanted. I went to try it on...in LARGE...and it wouldn’t do up! And Large is the largest size they do in that skirt. I couldn’t do up the largest size they had!!!? I was just about to have the hump about it when I remembered I had the two desserts at lunch and thought well, I’m happy with my life choices even if my bum and belly aren’t hahahahaha.

That said having a colostomy is no reason not to look good and feel good if you choose to. No one, absolutely no one can say having a colostomy means they have to dress badly, you can if you want to it’s a free country, but you don’t have to be contained or held back just because you have a stoma. I find that I have to dress according to what looks good on me rather than on the model in the shop. But then doesn’t everyone have to do that. 

I was drawn yet again to these silky skirts that a lot of the shops have at the moment that are like thick petticoats. But silk isn’t my friend. I tried one on, no idea why, I knew it wouldn’t look right, but I thought it was worth a go. Not only could you see the outline of my bag you could see the contents too. This is not a look I’ve ever aimed for. 

I can’t imagine anyone wants to see very clearly my pineapple upside down cake and my sticky toffee pudding. ;) 

Silky is off the menu.  

I’m still on the hunt for the perfect skirt for the look I have in mind. It’s out there, I know it is.  

Monday this week I was back up town (just to clarify I mean London not Braintree hahahahaha). Three days on the bounce I was doing something wonderful for the day, I’ve got to be honest I was dreading boring old Tuesday! Hahahahaha 

I was meeting my friend that works in a jewellers in Harrods. I can think of worse places to work hahahahaha...although I’d be a nightmare, I spend all the money I earn in Neptune in Colchester where I work on all the beautiful things we sell. I don’t even work in the store either, I work from home. So I can’t imagine what I’d be like working in a jewellers! :o

Anyway we had a fantastic lunch, we got chatting with the lovely lady next to us. We always end up chatting to people, unlike me O has a fantastically warm, friendly face. I love meeting up with her and the meal was outstanding in the Chinese restaurant in there, I didn’t even know it had one but the store is so cavernous that you’d never know what they have in there unless you’ve got a inside man...or in this case woman! 

 Weirdly I felt fabulous Monday too. I’m on a roll at the moment I could get used to being happy with my reflection rather than feeling contempt and unhappy. (This is not bag related, just a left over from low self esteem in my youth).

If anything my colostomy has made me see the real me even better than I did before my surgery. In what may seem a weird way round I look at my naked body approvingly. Maybe it’s just I’m still in awe of getting through something so nasty. But what ever it is I’m happy. Content with my shell and perfectly happy with the inside too. 

I felt fabulous, I felt I looked pretty good too. And I got compliments from strangers and friends both times I’ve worn this cardigan...I think it’s a magic cardi!  


Cardigan from The White Company, Top from Tommy Hilfiger, Leggings from Next, Shoes from LV for my birthday.  

Not bad for a grandma too! Hahahahaha  


On a serious note. It’s bowel cancer awareness month. I put a post out on my social media.  

It’s very close to my heart that people get early diagnosis.

I didn’t but, I got very lucky. I had bowel issues and symptoms for a good 15 years and it’s likely I had a cancerous tumour for at least 5-7 years before I was diagnosed. So I really count my lucky stars that I made it. 

I was fortunate as I had an older persons, slow growing cancer, so it had only spread to localised lymph nodes from the tumour site.  

I was lucky that it was a slow grower but unlucky that my GP’s had failed to pick it up even though I had been to them many times, year after year with the same symptoms.  

If you think something isn’t quite right with your health then push for further testing. I really wish I had. 

I am lucky that they could save me. I’m very grateful, but early diagnosis is the key to success. 


Check yourself and know your habits. xxx